


Risks in the Dark

by troubleinshangrila



Series: BLISS [4]
Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blind sex, Blindness, Disability, F/M, Sex, blind!Kagome, blind!Sesshoumaru, disability sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:08:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23862049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/troubleinshangrila/pseuds/troubleinshangrila
Summary: In which Kagome discovers freedom.
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/Sesshoumaru
Series: BLISS [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1719553
Comments: 11
Kudos: 86





	Risks in the Dark

Setting: Modern

Universe: Alternate

Big thanks to my blind pal Tony for helping me with this one - his insight is what made this fic work.

**Risks in the Dark**

o0o

"That's seven hundred and fifty yen."

Kagome sighed, the price for coffee had gone up again. She shook her head and fished around in her purse for the money. The five hundred yen coin was the largest with bead-like ridges within its rim. One hundred yen coins proved trickier, but she told them apart by checking for three raised digits. Fifty yen coins had the hole in the middle. Easy as pie.

She faced the cashier and offered him her money, her cheeks growing warm with embarrassment. "Sorry, my purse is a black hole. Here you go."

A moment later found Kagome inhaling her coffee's delicious aroma. She mentally berated herself for not counting her steps and forced herself to focus on tapping her white cane.

The _cane_. Kagome hated that cane. She hated how it immediately identified her as blind and she loathed the pity in people's voices because of it. Her blindness was all Naraku's fault. Miasma directly in the eyes - the last thing Kagome saw was Inuyasha performing a spectacular Wound of Wind. She woke up later to the voices of Souta and her mother and began asking them repeatedly when the bandages were coming off. That was when the doctor told her there were no bandages and that she was blind for the rest of her life.

Being blind was strange, Kagome discovered. First of all, she always thought she'd see solid black, but what she saw was black in the middle and faded to gray-brown in the periphery, as if she was facing a bright window with her eyes closed and a fingertip resting on each eyelid. Little squiggles of blue and red light danced across the wrinkled curtain between her brain and her eyes. This never changed. Eyes open or shut, out in the sun or in a dark alley, it remained the exactly the same. This frightened her and she reported it to her therapist at the rehabilitation center, but he eased her fears by telling her how people who suddenly lose their sight often see a mental image in place of their vision. What she saw was what she was going to see forever.

If that wasn't bad enough, she learned that Naraku's poison had completely obliterated her irises, lenses and retinas. Her once-lovely dark eyes were now cloudy with scarring on the corneas, thus making her blindness obvious whether she had her cane or not. The rest of her face was fine, thankfully, but the rug she called her life had been yanked out from under her feet. Cane travel lessons, braille, screen readers, friends abandoning her...three years of it and she still didn't feel at all adjusted to her blindness.

She was glad her mother found her an awesome college for the blind. Trying to compete with sighted students was not something she felt up to participating in just yet. Today was the start of a new semester. For full credits she had to take the class she dreaded the most - history. She would be forced to face all those painful memories she struggled to bury.

"What do you miss the most?" People often asked.

 _Being able to enjoy beautiful things,_ was always her reply. She missed seeing sunsets, rainbows and art. She missed seeing the faces that went with disembodied voices floating around her. She missed a lot of things.

Making her way outside, Kagome used the street as an orientation tool and turned abruptly left. She kept close to the wall, out of the way of people walking along the sidewalk. Tap to the left, step with the right foot. Tap right, step left. Clear a space and step into it. Reverse, repeat. She stopped walking when the door banged shut and sipped from her coffee, letting it burn her tongue. Even with two creams it was bitter, much like the past three years of her life.

Her watch beeped, waking her from her pity party. She uncurled her pinkie from the cane to tap a button and the watch's robotic voice vocalized the time. Eight o'clock.

 _I better get going_. Kagome thought.

Flipping her cane forward, she hurriedly turned right and walked the quick block towards the college campus.

o0o

Kagome strained her ears upon entering the college building. Canes tapped and dog claws clicked everywhere as people moved from class to class. Bodies briefly interrupted the air flow, creating sound shadows. Her history class was located at the top of the stairway at the end of the hall, which smelled heavily of clay from the pottery class situated opposite to the stairs. Somebody hurried down the tile corridor in stilettos.

The door opened and closed, sending a warm breeze into the cool air conditioning. Kagome felt the sun's heat on her bare legs.

Someone opened the door a third time and stepped inside. Whoever it was, they used a heavy rigid cane that sounded like it could crush any toe or small animal that wandered into its path. Kagome ignored the sound until its source stopped beside her.

"Excuse me."

She blinked and faced the low voice, "Are you referring to me?"

"Yes. I'm new to this building and need directions to room four hundred."

Going by voice alone, Kagome figured the man speaking to her was tall, relatively young and probably gorgeous. "I'm heading there myself, actually - "

"I'll follow you, then." When Kagome started walking, the man didn't follow. He said, "May I take your arm?"

"Oh, you're blind, too?" She blurted without thinking. He grunted the affirmative. Her face burned. "Um....sorry about that."

The other's cane tapped closer, but his footsteps were lost to the surrounding sounds. Kagome felt his slender hand settle on her shoulder and slide down to grasp her tricep. His warm fingers were long, delicate and smooth. She noted that he kept his nails carefully away from her skin. He smelled vaguely like thyme and rose petals. She began to tingle slightly where he touched her. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end. Her follower had a demonic aura, but he suppressed it well. It carried with it a vague familiarity that made her nervous.

"So, um...I'm Kagome Higurashi..." She faced forward, frowning as her cane contacted the staircase. _What a lame introduction!_

"I believe we have reached the stairs, this is all the guidance I need." The man released Kagome's elbow and tapped up the stairs himself. Kagome heard him pause, followed by the swish of a finger swiping across the braille sign beside the door. The door opened and clicked shut, muffling the sound of his tap-tapping.

 _Not even a thank you! What a jerk_.

Fuming a little, Kagome entered the room, once again straining her ears to find an empty seat. The desk nearest the door was vacant, so she took it. Whoever was sitting behind her was playing something on their headphones at a volume that let even her hear the singer's voice.

Around her, people talked and laughed. A few plunked away on slates and styluses - the blind person's equivalent to pencil and paper. Others typed on their note-takers, which were like video cassette-sized keyboards with six keys that could be pressed in a number of combinations to create braille cells. The data was either read out via speakers or through pins that popped near the bottom in a refreshable display. Some had both, others only had a display or read the data out loud. Other note-takers came with computer type keyboards, but they were often bulky. Kagome, who owned a Braille Lite that had a display and speaker, could tell who had what by listening for popping pins and robotic voices.

Mixed between braille noises were the huffs of panting guide dogs, clicks of canes being collapsed, different perfumes and aftershaves and the occasional brush of clothing or skin against her arm. The room was definitely large with good acoustics.

Someone cleared their throat, but the constant chatter continued. A briefcase was slammed down on the desk up front. The voices abruptly fell silent as if a hand clapped over every mouth.

"Good morning," said the smooth voice of the same man Kagome guided. "My name is Amasu Toga. I will be your history professor this semester."

A girl snickered and whispered, "He sounds attractive."

Professor Toga's footsteps came forward. Kagome sensed his presence in front of her like heat off a campfire. She heard him place something metal on her desktop and felt a lock of his hair as he passed. Like silk or fur, and probably tailbone length or longer.

"If you wish to remain in this class, there will be rules to follow. I may be blind myself, but I'm no fool and this is not high school." Professor Toga continued up the next row, his tone completely humorless. "First off, everyone is to be on time with their books open by the second bell. Secondly, I will not allow any student who uses abundant perfume or aftershave to stay in the room. I have a sensitive nose and don't wish to spend the rest of my day nursing a migraine."

 _Definitely a demon_ , Kagome smirked.

"Thirdly...cheating will not be tolerated under any circumstances. Cheaters will be expelled from the class and receive zero credits." A few gasped at this, but the professor continued smoothly, "Now, lastly, I have placed a bell on your desk. Each bell has a unique tone. You will ring these in place of raising your hand. Once I memorize your names and seating positions, I will know exactly who requires attention or wishes to answer a question by the pitch of your bell. So please, if you will, try to remain in the same seats for the duration of the semester. If anyone with low vision wishes to move forward, do so now."

Only six people moved. Kagome was surprised to discover she was the only one who chose a front row seat. She nudged the elbow of her new neighbor, "Hey, can you see enough to tell what he looks like?"

"Mmph," said a raspy female voice, "he's wearing a dark suit. Blue, maybe black. His hair's gray. Probably an old fart with a nice voice - "

"Or maybe I grayed prematurely," professor Toga cut in from closer than Kagome anticipated. "One more thing...idle chit chat and other objects of distraction belong in the hall or outside. That includes cellular phones, pagers - " he clicked something on the desk behind Kagome's, abruptly silencing the muffled music, " _and_ CD players."

A couple of annoyed huffs swept across the room like a wave. Someone turned off their phone.

"You may bring tape recorders to record my lectures if you so desire, in fact, I recommend you do so to supplement your studies. I will not, however, accept tape-recorded reports or term papers. Those of you with low vision will need to find a way to transcribe written work into braille. I do not care how you do this, just so long as you get it done."

Professor Toga about faced. His hair brushed Kagome's arm again. She could tell he had it in a ponytail. She innocently stuck her elbow out further with the intent of touching his hip. He shifted at just the wrong moment. Her elbow encountered his solid thigh and the cushion-like mound of his flaccid penis encapsulated behind his cotton-polyester trousers. He wasn't wearing underwear. She felt her face burn at this discovery and quickly jerked her arm back. He did not acknowledge her action. She hoped he thought it was an accident and nothing more.

Kagome heard professor Toga stop in front of her again. This time he slid a stack of papers onto her desk. "I'm placing a course syllabus on the first desk in each row. Take one and pass it back. Let me know if you prefer large print and I will have a copy available tomorrow."

Four of the students, including the girl next to Kagome, asked for large print. The rest preferred braille.

Blushing even more, Kagome slid her syllabus off the top and passed the rest back. Placing her left hand on the first braille row of characters, she let her right index and middle fingers slide across the raised dots. Just before reaching the second line, she let her left hand drop to the next row. Her braille skills were top notch and she read the entire class syllabus long before the last paper was passed back. Much to her chagrin, she noticed the class would indeed study the feudal era. Not just the history, but the mythology.

The word _demons_ blazed under her fingertips like tiny burning coals.

"I would like everyone to turn to the very last page of their syllabus and look at the bottom left corner. I have written a demon's name there. By the end of this semester, you are to have a full report on the chosen demon. Ten pages is the _minimum_." This produced many groans. He cut them off. "Failure to produce a report will destroy a third of your grade, so I suggest you start as soon as possible."

 _Ah, I didn't check there, the last page only took up half a sheet_. Kagome thought to herself, furrowing her brow. She searched for the wayward braille. _Hey, maybe I'll get Inuyasha or Shippou, or even Kouga!_ But the name under her fingers was beyond expectation. She read it three times to be sure she was right.

 _...Sesshoumaru? I have to do a report on Sesshoumaru? Just my freaking luck!_ She groaned and buried her head in her hands. _So much for enjoying the process_.

Professor Toga cleared his throat. His voice came from eleven o'clock, where Kagome assumed his desk was located. "Enough. Identify yourselves, starting with the first bell received. Ring your bell and state your name."

"Kagome Higurashi," Kagome rang her bell half-heartedly, trying not to let her voice crack. She heard the click of a Perkins brailler and then his voice calling the next name. He brailled so fast that he could type the names faster than the students said them.

Professor Toga's low, velvety voice and the way he so perfectly pronounced every word was so achingly familiar. Kagome put her head down on her desk and stared into space. His cold monotone continued. Her mind flashed images of small lips and dangerous fangs. The next time he spoke, her mind's eye formed icy amber eyes, maroon stripes and a blue crescent moon.

A gasp died in her throat. She quivered both hot and cold in her seat. Did he recognize her? No, there was no way he could remember her scent and voice through the centuries. She was so caught up in fear that she never even asked herself how he lost his sight.

The bell rang.

Kagome left the room before most of the others could rise from their seats.

o0o

The smell of paper and books and the scraggly sound of braille printers surrounded Kagome. She leafed dejectedly through a series of index cards. Beside her sat her note-taker. When she found a title she felt was necessary, she typed it down and moved on. She was surprised at the number of books that mentioned Sesshoumaru. Some called him a deity, others a god and still more considered him just a legend.

If she was going to write this report, she wanted to at least appear to study. Yet, even after scanning through a few of the books, she found herself writing what she remembered anyway - that he was a coldhearted bastard who somehow found his heart in the love of a little girl named Rin.

 _Well that's all good and wonderful, but what the hell is he doing here? Why do I have to face him again after everything I've been through? Karma really has it in for me_...

A cold demon aura prickled up Kagome's spine. She stiffened when the door opened and a probing cane crackled across the rubber mat. Hunching her shoulders, she tried to hide behind her book. Then she laughed at her own stupid idea. By the time she had disengaged her note-taker, closed her book and gathered her other belongings, the chair across from her was being scraped out from under the table.

"You don't sound very well, today," purred a satin voice. "Kagome Higurashi, right?"

"Mmhmm." Kagome stiffened, saying, "I-I'm fine. What are you going to read?"

"Poetry."

"Ahh...poetry's nice, I guess."

There came the thump as he opened the book, the pages rattled and soft swish-swishes sounded as his fingers swept the page. "You recognize me." He said it so casually, as if it meant little more than the weather. His fingers never ceased their motion.

"It wasn't that hard, it just took me longer since I can't see you. Then again, you can't see me, either..." Sitting down again, Kagome placed her hands flat on the table. Her sweaty palms stuck to the smooth tabletop. She lowered her voice and finally intoned his name, "...Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru merely snorted. "This was not the place I imagined encountering you again, _miko_. And please, if you must use a first name in public, call me Amasu."

Her blood chilled, sticking her muscles to her bones. "Okay then, _Amasu_. Is this why you gave me a syllabus with your name on it?"

"That was random chance," and he turned another page, his tone never rising above a whisper. "Will you kindly relax? If I honestly wanted you dead, you would have died in the hall this morning."

Kagome let her shoulders slump, but her spine was still solid steel. She heard herself ask, "How did it happen?"

This time, Sesshoumaru's fingers stopped moving. He slammed his book shut in a way that created a breeze without sound. "RP."

She swallowed with a dry throat. RP, shorthand for Retinitis Pigmentosa, was a disease that destroyed the retina, thus narrowing the visual field over several years. First, a person's night vision deteriorated. Then their peripheral vision shrank until they experienced tunnel vision, or seeing the world as though looking through a narrow tube. The lucky ones usually maintained central vision and only experienced blindness in the dark, but some eventually went completely blind.

Her first emotion was the same pity she hated hearing. She squelched it. "Do you still have some vision?"

"Only light perception, though I can pick up faint outlines with my right eye in certain lighting," came his casual reply. "It isn't reliable enough to be called 'sight'."

 _I guess he didn't get lucky, then_. Kagome thought while staring blankly towards his voice. "This is going to sound really stupid, but what exactly does light perception look like?"

Sesshoumaru's chair creaked as he leaned back. His answer was slow, almost practiced. "Foggy black until a light source turns it gray or white." When she said nothing, his tone turned a little condescending. "Think of how it was when you had sight and closed your eyes. You could still tell if a room was light or dark and locate a light source, correct?"

"Ah-ha! I understand now." Her spine loosened a few notches. She reminded herself constantly that he couldn't see her, and if he did she was just a hazy, indistinct, dark blur against a foggy background. "How long did it take?"

"Not long." Sesshoumaru pushed the book away, seemingly annoyed at the inquiry. "I was down to light perception within a century."

Kagome saw mental images of Sesshoumaru relying more and more on Rin's eyes. She saw him putting his nose up against parchments to read them, his entire face scrunched fiercely as he tried to make out the writing. Then came his poorer and poorer attempts to pass as sighted, his face burning in shame at the encroaching blindness he struggled desperately to hide. She pictured him narrowly managing to fight off enemies with a visual field the size of a soda straw. There were even images of him lost in a forest, night-blind, running into trees and tripping on rocks while trying to find his way home in the dark.

She sighed, lowering her head. The ridicule and shame he must have endured...

Sesshoumaru hissed, "Don't do the pity sigh. I loathe it."

"I wasn't," Kagome said. "I think you're luckier than I was. You had time to say goodbye to all those beautiful things before your sight deteriorated." She felt bitter tears well up, choking her voice, "For me, it was just....bam...one minute I saw everything and then next I was blind. I feel cheated. There's so much I'll never see because of Naraku."

A derisive snort. "You've given up on ever enjoying your life, as if blindness is some terrible tragedy. Pitiful. Tell me, Kagome, you're still breathing, right?"

"Last time I checked."

"Then your life isn't over yet." Sesshoumaru tapped his watch, clicked his tongue and stood up, taking the braille book with him. "I have another class to teach."

Her heart sank. Just when she thought she was seeing beyond his chilling exterior, he had to leave. "Can we meet later? Hey how about that coffee place just off-campus?"

Sesshoumaru didn't answer. Kagome heard him pick up his cane and glide towards the door.

o0o

 _Turn the corner, forty steps...where's the ratty little wall? A-ha_...

Kagome eased her cane leftward to feel up the uneven stucco wall. The vibrations it sent up the length of her cane made her hand tingle. She nodded to herself and let her cane touch it on each leftward swing, a technique called shorelining. It kept her walking straight and also acted as a landmark to tell her where she was. When the ratty wall ended, she knew she was only one street corner away from the little coffee shop. She paused when the tip of her cane dropped off the curb and listened for traffic.

"Need a hand, miss?" Suddenly, a hairy hand materialized from nowhere and grasped her upper arm. The hand propelled her across the street at a terrifying pace.

"Hey! I'm..." Kagome paused to wrench her arm free, her sense of direction lost. "I'm fine! Let go!"

"Tch. Whatever, lady," and the "helpful" man swept right on by. Kagome's heart rose into her throat. She turned left and headed for a curb, it didn't matter which one, just so long as she wasn't standing alone in a void where a vehicle could smash her at any moment. A car was already coming, though distant. She searched around and found the curb in eight steps. A sigh of relief blew past her lips upon noticing it was the curb she wanted, and she hurried towards the safety of the coffee shop.

The coffee shop was empty except for the cashier and one other sitting in the back booth. Kagome could hear the person sipping a drink and tapping their fingers to the tinny oldies music playing on the intercom. She approached the counter and cleared her throat.

"How can I help you?" This time the cashier sounded like a young woman, her voice light and cheery.

"Coffee, please, with two creams," said Kagome, already fishing for the proper change. She handed it over when she heard the cashier place her steaming styrofoam cup on the countertop. "Thanks."

Coins rattled into the cash register tray. It slammed into the machine and the receipt noisily printed itself out. The cashier ripped it from the roll and placed it on the counter top. "You're welcome. Have a nice day."

Kagome nodded to the woman, pocketed the receipt and carried her coffee to a table by the window. She folded her cane and placed it on the tabletop. A moment later the person sitting in the corner booth slid out, walked forward and stopped by her table.

"I hope the invitation for coffee is still open."

Startled, Kagome lifted her head, instinctively trying to make eye contact. "I...sure, grab a seat."

Sesshoumaru leaned his rigid cane against the wall and eased himself down. The table was small, and Kagome felt his sleeve brush her knuckles when he lowered his drink. He seemed to prefer his coffee black. She raised her cup for a generous sip.

"How did it happen?" Sesshoumaru asked in such a tone that Kagome couldn't tell if he was curious or bored.

Kagome's fingers trembled against her warm drink. "Miasma...it was sprayed almost directly into my eyes three years ago. I don't even know how the fight ended. I think the well sealed, otherwise Inuyasha surely would've come back to see how I was."

"You couldn't return because Inuyasha took your jewel shards away." Slowly, deliberately, Sesshoumaru sipped his coffee and swallowed. "Naraku killed them all. Without you, they had not a chance. He completed the jewel and became a full demon. And in his moment of glory...it was I who slew him. He was powerful as a full demon, but not as powerful as myself."

Coldness crept across Kagome's arms and legs. Everyone she knew back then was gone, save for Sesshoumaru. Deep down she had expected to hear they all died...her pure miko powers were the only true weapon against Naraku's darkness. Kikyou descended to hell long before the last battle. Kagome still felt as though she had abandoned them.

Stinging tears fell hard and fast down her cheeks. She made no effort to wipe them away.

"Their ends were quick." He lowered his voice to a whisper, "Tenseiga would not revive them."

Without thinking, Kagome searched for Sesshoumaru's hands. She found them folded tightly together, the skin pulled taut around his knuckles, and could only imagine him struggling to maintain a stoic expression. He made no motion to encourage or discourage her actions.

She was sorely disappointed when her mind wouldn't produce a clear picture of what his hands looked like. Well, he only had one most of the time. Perhaps she hadn't paid enough attention to them when he got his arm back, or maybe the years smudged what she remembered. Sesshoumaru's hands were thinner, softer than Inuyasha's, his fingertips worn smooth from the constant use of braille and trailing against rough edges. His nails grew like dog's claws, but seemed shorter from what she recalled.

Suddenly, Sesshoumaru's hands retreated and explored hers in exactly the same manner as she did to him. Kagome sat there, frozen, too startled to withdraw. His light touch was like a slow caress across her skin. It felt so nice having him touch her to know her, as opposed to people touching her to steer her around or get something from her.

"You seem so well adjusted," Kagome said, trusting her voice not to shake. "I mean, being blind doesn't seem to bother you at all. You're...used to it...but don't you miss anything?"

"Occasionally." Sesshoumaru withdrew his hands. He finished off his coffee. "There is an old proverb that says 'It is better to light a single candle than to sit and curse the dark.'"

Kagome stared towards his voice, her mouth dry. "Dark is all I know...I feel like the world is disappearing."

"Hn." He uncurled from his seat, dumped his empty cup into a trash bin and grasped his cane. Kagome unfolded hers. She was just in time to hear him tap to the door, and hurried to catch up. Her cane bashed his a couple of times before she established a safer tempo. His cane was over a foot longer than hers. He tended to slide his cane tip between taps, causing a scratching noise amidst the rhythmic clicks.

"I'm serious...sometimes I think I'm disappearing with it."

Sesshoumaru paused at the corner, "What do you miss the most?"

The dreaded question. Kagome answered it like she always did.

He actually laughed. He had a low, rumbling laugh that wasn't at all derisive. "Once you stop seeing whatever darkness you see, you'll realize you aren't missing too much."

They stepped off the curb together, canes clicking and clacking against the asphalt. Kagome noticed people moved out of Sesshoumaru's way when they saw him coming. His cane travel was obviously better than hers. He never seemed to catch his cane in cracks or miss uneven sidewalk like she did. To him, moving the cane was as unconscious as breathing or blinking, while she still had to chant 'left-right-left' in her mind to keep the cane swinging.

In all honesty he didn't walk any slower than she remembered while they were both still sighted. She felt like the tortoise chasing the hare. His pace scared her.

"Geez, slow down! We're not in a race."

"You need to stop walking with your head down." Sesshoumaru's pace remained unchanged. "It looks pitiful. Just trust the cane like your O and M instructor taught you. I _do_ hope you had one."

"Yeah, yeah, I did..."

"Then show what you've learned instead of expecting people to help you." He veered off the sidewalk and began leading her down a path she never traveled before. "When is the last time you went somewhere unknown?"

Kagome bit her lip, her pace cutting in half as she checked the terrain. There was rough asphalt with an old, cracked cement gutter in the center. The sun cast warmth on her left ear, telling her she faced north. Buildings stood on either side. She could tell because they created hulking sound shadows that threatened to swallow her whole.

Sesshoumaru's tapping and scratching grew further away. Kagome struggled to catch up. She almost crashed into a shopping cart left carelessly in the alley way and her cane kept catching on the uneven pavement. "Wait!"

"No."

Anger, resentment and embarrassment welled in the pit of her stomach. She followed Sesshoumaru's movements until he fell silent, causing her to search. From nowhere, his hand wrapped around her shoulder. She yelped. He snickered.

Sesshoumaru now held her wrist, his grip firm, but not painful. "What angers you, Kagome? My fast pace, or my lack of pity?"

"What the hell are you talking about? I hate pity."

"Oh...that isn't the image I see." She felt him lean forward, his voice almost in her ear, "You walk around with your head down, cursing the darkness and believing the world has disappeared. At that rate, miko, you will never find the beauty you so dearly miss. You can not change what has happened, you can only live with what remains."

She wrenched her hand from his grasp. He willingly let go, but didn't move away. She glared towards him, "What do you know? You had time to deal with what happened to you. I lost everything in an instant! There's a difference! I've had to depend on other people for so much, and I hate it!"

Suddenly, Sesshoumaru's face was barely an inch from hers. Seething anger scorched through his words even though his voice never changed its volume or tone. "You know nothing of what I dealt with over the last few centuries, you coddled little girl! You never watched your world shrink away into darkness. You never woke up one morning to discover that one little pinhole of light you could see yesterday is gone, and given anything to have even that much back. You never had to navigate unfamiliar territory utterly alone, without a cane or a guide to help you." There was pain in his voice. Dark, bitter pain. "If you think losing your sight slowly is easy, then you are a fool."

The anger Kagome felt cooled only slightly. "Yeah? Try waking up one day to find out you can't see a thing! Try not being prepared for it at all and suddenly being thrust into braille and canes and voices you thought you recognized! Try losing your friends because they're embarrassed to be seen with you! Try realizing that people you cared about died because YOU lost your sight! How would you feel if Rin died because you couldn't see?"

He stood up straight, his tone lowering dangerously, "Rin _did_ die because of it."

Kagome stopped cold, the rage slapped from her words. "W-what? How?"

"She fell through thin ice...and drowned inches from my feet because I could not scan fast enough to spot her in time." Sesshoumaru sighed, "Rin was nearly sixty years old...it was probably the best for her to die when she did. Tenseiga must have known I could no longer protect her."

"God," Kagome clenched her teeth and muttered, "Sorry...I'm so sorry. This is so stupid, why are we fighting?"

"I believe it started with the pity game." Sesshoumaru replied wearily, clearly bored with the whole argument. He started walking again, heading for some unknown end to the alleyway.

If Kagome was honest with herself, she was used to the pity. She became so accustomed to hearing it that she came to expect it as the norm, and realizing that Sesshoumaru offered none felt like a dash of ice water in her face. Embarrassed and sullen, she hurried to catch up. It wasn't long before she smelled freshly cut grass and her cane found the familiar cobblestones marking the edge of the college campus. Safe at last, she relaxed.

"Is that alley your usual path through here?"

"No," He tapped up the front steps. "I go a different way whenever I can."

"So you had no idea where that alley would take you?" Kagome raised a brow. He confirmed the affirmative, prompting her to sigh. "It's easier to get lost that way."

His voice came from near the glass doors, "It's easier to find something new that way."

 _Touché_ , she thought.

"If a captive bird doesn't leave its cage when the opportunity arises, it will never again know freedom. Take a risk once in awhile, escape that cage." Sesshoumaru heaved the door open, "Even if you fail, at least you ventured beyond the bars and discovered something new."

"Um..." Kagome hustled to get through the door before he released it. She said, "I just can't believe today...you, me going blind, running into you as my history professor." A sudden thought struck her, causing her to stop just inside the door. "Hey, do you, um...still look the same as you did...you know?"

Kagome was startled when Sesshoumaru grasped her wrist and placed her palm on his face. Her fingertips found the part in his satin bangs and glided easily across his smooth brow. His pencil thin eyebrows and long eyelashes seemed so strangely familiar. He had aged, faint lines were starting in the corners of his spindle shaped eyes. She felt his high, sharp cheekbones, followed the perfect slope of his tipped-up nose and brushed her fingers across his small mouth. He had warm, feminine lips that almost didn't match his masculine jaw. She outlined his pointed ears while her mind's eye filled in his pale skin, gilded eyes, demonic markings and silver hair. His glorious tresses was currently pulled back in a ponytail, but she could tell by its weight that he hadn't cut any off.

He felt different than the image still floating in her mind's eye. He seemed more solid, weathered and real under her fingers. Time was eroding him, his emerging crow's feet providing evidence of its slow march. Like her, one day, he would grow old, wrinkle up and die.

The thought of him being mortal hurt. It didn't feel right.

"Do you still have your markings?"

"Yes, but when I'm in public, I use a weak barrier to hide them...as well as make my ears and nails look round." He turned his head slightly, "You feel my ears and nails as they truly are because of your miko powers. Others, blind or not, just see a normal man who grayed prematurely."

"I wish _I_ could see you," she whispered.

His lips tightened against her fingertips. "You are seeing me."

Then he pushed her hand away and withdrew, his cane taps echoing down the corridor.

o0o

Four months passed. Kagome moved slowly with the ebb and flow of her classes, accepting projects and turning in assignments as required.

Sesshoumaru didn't play favorites at all. When she was in his classroom, he treated her and graded her like any other student. She had to do every assignment he passed out, even the ones they both knew she could do without needing to study. Kagome felt that she had an unfair advantage in some areas - especially those dealing with demons - so she seldom answered questions in class unless Sesshoumaru specifically called on her.

He proved himself an excellent professor; well spoken, no nonsense and very formal. Prone to pacing about the room while giving lectures, his hand touching each desk and removing the unnecessary distractions younger students always snuck in. These ranged from braille magazines to iPods, pagers and cellular phones. He never finished a lecture until he was sure everyone in the room understood the lesson, even if it meant picking up where the class left off the day before. His grades were always extremely fair - a little too fair, according to a few slackers.

Kagome soon discovered that Sesshoumaru not only used a cane, he also owned a guide dog. An unusual breed for the job, yet the canine suited him. Sesshoumaru described the dog as a white Siberian husky named Fluffy. The name was not Sesshoumaru's choosing, but it was the only name the dog knew, so it stuck.

"Sometimes I'm not in the mood to swing my cane around," was his explanation. Fluffy's clicking claws stopped when they reached the steps. Sesshoumaru said, "Fluffy, upstairs." and they headed briskly up the staircase, leaving Kagome alone in the hall.

Sesshoumaru commanded Fluffy to sit by the door when he wasn't acting as a guide. Fluffy would growl at anyone trying to sneak in or out, thus alerting his master to the sneaky students. Nobody wanted to mess with him.

After class that day, they took a walk across campus to the library. Sesshoumaru navigated with Fluffy just as easily as he did with a cane, and his walking pace remained maddeningly fast.

Kagome suspected Sesshoumaru understood the dog's barks, growls, grunts and whines like a second language. More than once she had caught him making similar sounds back at Fluffy, much like Kouga and his demon friends used to do around common wolves.

While Sesshoumaru was a hard nose inside class, outside was a different story. He and Kagome started having coffee and going out to lunch.

Once, they even went to a carnival. Kagome hadn't been to a carnival since she lost her sight. She found some of the rides, especially the roller coasters, a lot more thrilling when she couldn't see what was going on.

Sesshoumaru put his cane aside to throw darts at balloons and won a dolphin plushie. The game peddler never even knew he was blind.

"That was amazing!" Kagome cradled the dolphin when he handed it to her, "I could never do that."

"It's dusk. I can make out more at this time of day," he explained, "and I could see the light reflecting off the balloon, so I made my best guess."

"Ahh, I wish I even had that much vision - "

"Trust me, Kagome, it isn't very useful." He squeezed her arm. "I'll wake up someday to nothingness, so I don't often rely on my light and shape perception. It isn't worth the strain."

Kagome ducked her head and said nothing more.

On the ferris wheel, they held hands. They rode bumper cars, shared a soda, had a silly string fight(or rather, Kagome sprayed Sesshoumaru and anyone who happened to be standing next to him) and just wandered around aimlessly, taking in the crowd. Kagome tried to juggle cotton candy, the stuffed dolphin, her cane and Sesshoumaru's elbow. He never offered to carry anything.

Kagome noticed that Sesshoumaru would randomly withdraw his guidance and leave her alone, leading her to tap warily around in search of a wall or railing. In order to find one, she had to memorize their locations and pay attention to new scents, sounds and landmarks. Sesshoumaru never failed to be standing right next to whatever grounded object she needed to grab.

"I hate it when you do that!"

"Yes, but you're also getting better at using that cane," he pointed out.

Her anger dissolved. "Am I really?"

"Yes."

"Mm..." She grasped Sesshoumaru's arm and gave it a tight squeeze, "feel like riding the Gravitron?"

A week later, Sesshoumaru tucked her into a taxi at midnight without telling her where they were going. Her only clue was that he told her to dress warm, so she dressed herself in a sweatsuit and a thick jacket. Sesshoumaru showed up in a turtleneck and jeans, his hair tied back in a long braid.

Upon arrival at their destination he guided her into a hulking building and down a flight of steps. It was cold. Kagome scrunched her lips, trying in vain to make guess at her surroundings, but there were no sound shadows or people. The only clues her cane offered was many rows of benches and the acoustics of an arena.

"What is this place?"

In reply, Sesshoumaru guided her to sit on a bench and thrust something heavy against her hands. "Put these on."

Kagome ran her fingers over a pair of boots with tight laces and a cold blade of metal attached to the bottom. Alarm bells went off in her mind. Surely this was a joke! "Are you kidding me?"

Swishes as he tied his own laces. "I do not 'kid', Kagome. Put them on."

"...I can't do this." She held the ice skates back out to him. They disappeared from her grasp. A second later, strong hands pulled her tennis shoes off. "Oh! What the - "

"You can, and you will." Sesshoumaru said, his voice betraying nothing. "I paid a lot of money to have this place opened at such an ungodly hour." He worked the ice skates over her socks and tugged the laces into tight, perfectly even bows. "What do you have to lose?"

"I could fall and break my neck!"

"Or you might enjoy yourself."

The tugging stopped. Kagome found herself being pulled onto her feet and led forward towards the coldness. Solid ground retreated from beneath her. All that held her up were two thin pieces of metal. Her sense of balance seemed utterly drowned. She heard Sesshoumaru's skates rhythmically scratch the ice and clung to his arm like white on rice, terrified of the million nonexistent holes waiting to swallow her up.

"Go slow!"

"No," Sesshoumaru replied, utilizing that mocking tone she loathed. The scraping of his skates upped their tempo. Kagome's heart did the same when cold air blasted her face. He shook her from his arm and took her hand. "If you don't start skating, I'm going to pull you right off your feet."

Kagome hurriedly matched his movements, holding his hand in a death grip while he coasted them along on momentum alone. "Aren't you afraid you'll hit a wall?"

"There aren't any," he said simply, speeding up even more, "the only walls here are the doubts that hold you back."

"No, stupid!" She realized she sounded like Inuyasha only after the words escaped her lips, and tried not to scream when Sesshoumaru pulled her through a hairpin turn. "The skating rink walls!"

"Ohhh, _those_ walls...hm, you know," he drew her against his chest and turned his body sideways, causing them to spin in place. His voice washed across the top of her head. "It is worth the risk, don't you think?"

"Stop it!" A bomb went off behind Kagome's belly button. "You're insane, Sesshoumaru! We're both blind! We aren't supposed to do things like this!"

"Who says we can't enjoy the same things sighted people do?" Sesshoumaru snorted derisively, "You're just frightened, Kagome. You will never find the beauty you so dearly miss if you keep hiding behind the words 'I can't'."

With that, Sesshoumaru withdrew completely. Kagome stood there, frozen, as the clicks and scrapes of his skates moved away. Fear, rage and the cold left her trembling. She heard him swish past her at breakneck speed, a loud click, then a faint breeze and a grinding thump. Ice sprayed her when he tilted his skates to stop scarcely a foot from where she stood.

"You're going to break your neck jumping like that!" She shouted towards his breathing.

He just snickered and darted about like a dolphin through water. His disembodied voice circled her, he was skating backwards, "I thought you would like my triple lutz. How about a triple toe-loop instead?"

"No! I want off this ice!" Kagome shouted as Sesshoumaru leapt again, and braced herself for the sickening thud of a fall that never came. Instead, her ears detected the scrape of a graceful landing.

"I will make a deal with you, Kagome." Now he was at the far end of the rink, his breathless voice echoing off the high ceiling, "If you can catch me, I'll take you home."

Sweat broke out in her armpits. "Are you insane?"

"I won't lead you into any walls," he slipped past her, still skating backwards at a medium pace. His smirk was evident in the condescending tone he was using. "Just follow the sound of my blades hitting the ice, or are your human ears so pathetic that you can't follow a simple sound?"

 _You seem to have forgotten that I have NO light perception, you jerk!_ Kagome fumed while straining her ears. She heard him kick off for another triple toe-loop and grind by a second time. It finally dawned on her that he, Sesshoumaru, the stoic demon lord without a western land, was actually having _fun_. It wasn't something she ever imagined him doing. She couldn't even picture him smiling, let alone goofing off and toying with her this way.

A resolute sigh heaved Kagome's shoulders. For a moment she had actually forgotten that Sesshoumaru was blind, too. Why wasn't it such a huge obstacle to him? How could his life seem so...normal? Was it because he accepted it readily and discarded it as nothing more than a nuisance? Or did she just need more time?

Sesshoumaru made another pass. "I'm waiting."

Kagome sighed again and skated forward a few awkward steps, telling herself again and again that nothing lay waiting in her immediate path. She focused on the smooth ice beneath her feet and dared to skate a little faster. "Okay, I'm skating."

Snickering from the far right. "That's a start."

His mocking tone ignited a white line of rage behind her breastbone. That moment, she decided to show him she could ice skate even if it meant falling and hitting a million walls! She kicked off the ice and scraped towards the click of his skates, "Here I come, you bastard!"

Sesshoumaru's grinding picked up speed. Kagome knew she was gaining on him. Then he pulled a wide turn and swept right past her. She spun to grab him, but he slipped away. Frustrated, she about-faced and gave chase at a speed she would never dare run. She forgot about the ice, her skates and the walls, there was only soft grinding noises and their heavy breathing.

It felt like flying. She marveled at the roller coaster feeling of turns and twirls. Sesshoumaru's skating noises grew closer by the second. Ten feet, five feet, two feet...

 _Almost there_.

"Got you!" Kagome lunged. Sesshoumaru dodged, but grabbed her arm and they spun the rest of the way across the rink. They finally halted when Sesshoumaru grabbed the far wall. Laughing, Kagome held the railing, hyper aware that Sesshoumaru's heaving chest was pressed to her shoulder.

He laughed, though it seemed more like a gasp, and skated gently backwards away from her. "And you enjoyed the freedom, didn't you?"

She followed his voice. "Yeah, and I'm still scared to death. Can we go now? I'm getting co- " her blades caught on a hole in the ice. She stumbled, grabbing his chest to save her balance. Through his thin turtleneck she felt his nipples, which were erect from the cold. He gasped softly, seeming just as startled as she.

"Hn," he said after an awkward silence, "I feel a bit chilly myself."

 _I can tell_. Kagome's face burned. _Nice pecs...nice body...nice everything. Ooh, what the hell am I thinking?_ She lifted her hands and slowly wrapped them around his elbow. "Let's go."

o0o

A door slammed open in unison with two dozen footsteps. Class had recently ended, leading to a mad dash for restrooms or the cafeteria.

Kagome wrinkled her nose at the scents of old clay. Her pottery project sat before her on a table, a braille tag on the side telling her she had a B. Points were marked off because she used such a plain shape. She didn't understand, she had been taught to make bowls and vases, why was following the rules suddenly wrong?

A tapping cane halted at the door. "You didn't take a risk, did you?"

She startled, jerking her head towards Sesshoumaru's voice. Before she could answer, his hands came around to inspect her new bowl. His nails rattled across its smooth surface and occasionally clicked against the spots that cracked. Then a stool scraped against the wooden floor. Sesshoumaru moved her project off the turntable and replaced it with new clay, which thudded wetly before her.

"I'll watch, this time." He murmured, placing his hands over the backs of hers. In order to do so, he had to reach around her, and his breath whispered against her ear. "You just shape it."

Kagome's heart doubled its pace. All she could feel was Sesshoumaru's smooth hands resting on hers, his fingers cold and wet from the clay. He breathed slowly, little puffs tickling her earlobe. His lips were _right there_ , almost touching her hair. She swallowed hard and worked the pedal. The turntable groaned to life, the cool clay whirling smoothly under her hands. It wasn't long before she started forming a bowl much like her last project.

Sesshoumaru's hands followed her movements as she pressed down on top of the mound, creating a dimple in the middle that she shaped into a slanted edge.

"You're being too plain."

"If I fool around too much, it'll collapse," Kagome replied.

His voice carried a smirk. "And if it does, you just pick up the mess and start again."

Biting her lip, Kagome used her thumbs to fold the bowl's rim outward and down, causing it to open like a flower. After the edges had thickened to her liking, she pressed inward with just her fingertips and SQUISH, the entire thing imploded. Wet clay spun off the top and splattered on her cheek.

"Um...." her face burned, "oops? Did that get you?"

"Nothing a towel can't handle," came Sesshoumaru's cool reply.

Kagome giggled nervously and began again, utilizing a slower pace than before. It was hard to focus while surrounded by Sesshoumaru's hands, breath and scent. Her heart kept fluttering. Placing her hands on either side of the clay, she shaped it taller and pressed the center down with her thumbs. She kept her fingers curved so the rim faced inward. With her other hand she occasionally squeezed her fingertips in on one side. The resulting object wasn't perfectly round or even. When she could mold it no more, she took her foot off the pedal.

"It's going to look ugly," Kagome grumbled, wiping her face and hands on a rag. She held the old cloth up for Sesshoumaru.

"Only to those who look with their eyes." Sesshoumaru made an approving noise. He accepted the towel and quickly wiped his hands clean. "Bake it."

She did so, and when her sculpture was cool enough to the touch, they explored it together.

The smooth bowl was cupped on top like the underside of a mushroom. Ridges formed wavering patterns along each side. On the bottom, where she dragged her fingers, she found something akin to the rings on a tree-stump. The bowl's irregular, dipping edges reminded her of rolling hills and waves on the ocean.

"It's..." Kagome explored the sculpture again. Her hand ran into Sesshoumaru's. "It feels pretty neat." She turned her head to smile at him, only to freeze at realizing just how close he was standing. His breath literally puffed across her mouth. He was so close she could have kissed him.

Sesshoumaru seemed just as startled by their close proximity. He swallowed, audibly licked his lips and said, "Have dinner at my place tonight." Not a question, a statement.

That came out of the blue. Kagome blinked to ensure she heard correctly. "Um...sure...are you going to take me after your classes?"

"No," he said in that mocking tone she hated, "I'm going to braille the directions, you have to get there yourself."

"Ass," Kagome teased, pressing her weight against his chest to give him a little shove. Her hip brushed his thigh. He was wearing jeans today for casual Friday, and she swore he had an erection hiding behind the fly. Playing it off as an accident, she blushed and hurried off to catch some lunch.

o0o

Time could never pass more slowly than it did that afternoon. An hour seemed to go by between each tick of the second hand on every clock in the building. Kagome's last class ended at four o'clock. As she stopped at a vending machine for some chocolate Pocky, it started pouring outside, and time slowed even further.

"Just my luck," Kagome muttered. She just knew that her blouse and skirt would be soaked through by the time she arrived at Sesshoumaru's home. Hopefully her blouse wouldn't turn transparent, and if it did, she hoped her bra would stay opaque.

Taking a quick breath, Kagome pushed out into the rain. Sesshoumaru's instructions rang through her mind, _Turn left at the end of the campus...head down the alley from this afternoon and make another left. Walk six blocks and you'll hit grass on the left. Shoreline until you smell a bakery. Cross the street there and you'll hit a dead end - from there, go right. My house is behind the iron fence with the wind chimes. Not hard at all_.

The rain peppered her skin. Droplets clunked against parked cars and slapped the pavement. It gurgled along gutters, pattered across buildings and hissed over awnings. Cars swished as they passed on the street. Wet shoes squished along the sidewalk. Umbrellas snapped open left and right. The air was heavy with scents of dirt, wet cement, grass and people. Kagome's cane tapped sluggishly through puddles. She heard and smelled everything as clearly as if someone painted a picture for her nose and ears. She knew Sesshoumaru made her walk by herself on purpose, and for that she was grateful.

This was the furthest Kagome had ever walked alone since she lost her sight. For the first time in a long while, she felt truly free. Out on her own, a prisoner to no one's arm. Nobody to tell her how to swing her cane, which way she should go or how fast to walk. Every travel decision was up to her. It was exhilarating.

 _Is this what true independence feels like?_ she wondered to herself.

Kagome felt her cane tap against grass and shorelined until she smelled hot apple pies. She moved to the curb, tilting her head to listen for traffic. None. A smile bloomed on her lips, the rain was splattering hard against a eucalyptus tree two steps away. Across the street, wind chimes tinkled gently in the breeze. Kagome crossed with her head up. The dead end came sooner than she anticipated, but she made it. Turning right, she kept a hand on the brick wall until cold, wet metal glided under her fingertips. It wasn't long before she found herself standing right beside the tinkling wind chimes.

She stepped through the gate and tapped her way up a stepping stone pathway. At the door, she instinctively tried to put order into her sopping hair. When it didn't cooperate, she tied it into a bun and hoped for the best.

The door slid open before she could knock. Soft shamisen music and the scent of various foods floated out, "I see you made it." Sesshoumaru's hand emerged to touch her forearm, "Come in before you get too drenched."

"A little late for that, I'm afraid...it started raining right as I left." Kagome offered Sesshoumaru the Pocky she bought. "It's Pocky. Sorry for such a crummy gift, I just didn't have the money on me to get something better," she said while she folded her cane.

"It's all right. Thank you," Sesshoumaru's tone was subdued and polite. The Pocky disappeared from her grasp a moment later. "Take my arm and I'll give you the basics of my living room."

Kagome removed her shoes and socks and grasped Sesshoumaru's elbow. He was wearing a different shirt now, and the cut of the sleeve told her it was a polo shirt that fit him perfectly. Her nose detected apple-scented shampoo. Sesshoumaru's loose, immaculately neat hair was slightly damp and warm from the heat of a blow dryer, a sign that he recently showered.

Two steps and her toes found a line of electrical tape stretched across the tatami mat in her path. "What's this?"

"Ah...the tape tells me when I'm coming up on a fusama. Sometimes I forget whether one is open or shut, so when I step on the tape, I stick my hand out to check."

"Oh." Kagome ducked her head. "Smart one, I should try that in my own place sometime."

Sesshoumaru slowed his pace. "We're standing in the living room, and this table is in its very center." He led Kagome forward until her shins brushed a low table. "From here, the television, stereo and thermostat are at three o'clock. There is a half-bathroom at two...it's hardly larger than a closet. The kitchen is at one, the tatami becomes tile so that's easy to find. At twelve you have the back door. You'll find a sofa and end table at ten, so be careful, even I trip on them from time to time. The linen closet sits next to my bedroom at nine o'clock. Fluffy is sleeping at eight. His bed is over there, so do watch out that you don't slip. That's about it - oh!" He turned suddenly, his tone still deadpan, "at seven o'clock, I have a small training dojo, and just past it is the laundry room. It is the only door with a step, so try not to trip if you go that way."

"Thanks," Kagome still felt a little lost, so she kept her shins against the table. Her soggy clothes clung against her frame, making her nipples stand erect and causing goosebumps to break out on her skin. She shivered, "I really need to dry these, I'm freezing."

The arm she held withdrew. Sesshoumaru's bare feet padded around the table. The closet fusama growled on its tracking and something rustled. Moments later, a soft yukata was pressed into her hands. "If it makes you more comfortable, you can change in my room. I'll put your cane by the door and get some hot tea going."

"All right, thanks." She willingly handed him her cane, then used the table as a guide to locate his bedroom. For safety, she kept her right arm out at waist level to protect herself from entering the doorway crookedly.

Kagome expected Sesshoumaru's bedroom to be lavish, but it was quite plain. A toilet hissed in an adjoining bathroom on the right. It smelled strongly of shampoo, indicating just how recent his shower had been. His bed was in the far left corner, and felt more like a nest surrounded by fur. Kagome rubbed her fingers over the fur and realized it was the fluffy pelt he used to wear on his shoulder. The pelt surrounded a queen sized mattress decorated with an embroidered quilt and two velvet throw pillows. The whole thing sat on a foot tall platform. His nightstand seemed little more than a large piece of stone shaped vaguely like a brick.

She searched the room for anything to throw her wet clothes over. In one corner she found an antique sewing table. Filigree carvings adorned its sides and legs. A bronze sculpture shaped like a man with four arms stood front and center. Beneath it, she found brailled paper so old the dots were worn too flat for her to read. Behind the four-armed figure was another, slightly larger wood sculpture of a man with a narrow head and pointed ears. She blushed when her hands encountered a very naked miniature of Michelangelo's "David". There were also hand-woven baskets, a string of bones, an elaborately decorated medieval dagger and a long lock of thick, wavy hair. Her blood ran a little cold at that. She knew whose head that hair came from. A shiver ran down her spine. She touched the wall and resumed trailing, her fingers brushing against the cold glass of a window.

The only thing that seemed sturdy enough to hold wet clothes without getting ruined was a sword rack. Kagome's probing fingers wandered over a smooth, rounded metal pommel and a second, flatter one. The images of these swords, Toukijin and Tenseiga, struck her so fiercely that she swore she could see them. Toukijin's chilling blade still seemed sharp enough to split hairs, and Tenseiga's handle felt as new as the first time she saw it tucked into Sesshoumaru's obi.

Kagome hurriedly peeled her wet clothes off and draped them over the sword rack. Even her bra and panties were soaked, so she tossed them as well and encapsulated herself in the warm yukata. The yukata was too large and she had to roll up the sleeves to keep them from swallowing her hands.

Placing a hand on the wall, she started to trail out when the cracked closet door caught her attention. Her curiosity got the better of her. She slid the door open a few inches and brushed her fingers over Sesshoumaru's clothes. Turtlenecks, T-shirts, sweatshirts, flannel shirts, a few sleeveless tops, jeans and a pair of leather pants populated one side. The other half housed the suits he wore to work. Shirts, ties, trousers and jackets. His clothes were all labeled with a braille tag sewn someplace visually inconspicuous.

 _I bet he looks smashing in black,_ she mused.

Sesshoumaru's old armor sat neatly on a small form in a back corner of the closet. It was wrapped around his old silk kimono. The stark familiarity brought tears to Kagome's eyes. She settled her hands flat on the smooth metal chest plate and rubbed her fingers over the spiked shoulder guard. Her other hand followed the V-shaped neckline in the lavish kimono. She couldn't stop imagining Sesshoumaru's living, breathing body heaving inside the heavy silk.

"Kagome?"

"Mmguh?" the closet muffled her voice. _Someone, please, kill me now_...

His arched brow was audible in his voice. "...what are you doing?"

"I um...one of my earrings fell out and I think it bounced under the door." Kagome said lamely, pretending to rustle around. "Aha! I found it." She stood up and feigned putting something in her ear, afraid the lighting was just so that Sesshoumaru could see her outline.

Sesshoumaru offered a 'whatever you say' chuckle in the same instant thunder rumbled outside. "Bring me your wet clothes, I'll put them in the dryer."

There was a zapping sound and the music playing in the living room abruptly cut off. Kagome almost laughed, even if there were any lights to go off, she wouldn't have noticed.

"...or not."

Kagome chuckled self-consciously. "It looks like we'll be ordering takeout instead of a home-cooked meal."

A noisy huff from Sesshoumaru. "My stove is gas-powered. And supper will be ready shortly. I'll hang your clothes up and put them in the dryer when the power comes back." His voice muffled slightly as he brushed past her to hang the wet clothes in his shower. On his second pass, he said, "By the way, we're having domburi with an eel topping. I thought I would keep it simple tonight."

"That's fine." Kagome smiled in his direction, "Anything I can do to help?" But silence was her only reply. Sesshoumaru had already left the room. Kagome clamped her mouth shut. She _hated_ it when people didn't warn her they were leaving, thus causing her to stand there and chatter to empty air.

Embarrassed, she trailed to the door, stepped out and shuffled towards the central table. Eleven steps, then her shins hit the hard wood. She could smell the eel cooking on the stove and her ears detected the telltale gurgle of boiling rice.

"Sesshoumaru?"

"Right across from you," Sesshoumaru said, his amusement undisguised. "And no, I don't need assistance setting the table." There was a swish. He disappeared again, this time into the kitchen. Kagome heard him rustle pots, pans and bowls. He chopped something at a speed she would never dare attempt without sight. Then he lifted a lid off a pot and the smell of hot rice wafted from wall to wall, making her aware of just how hungry she really was.

A loud crack of thunder startled Kagome from her reverie. "Wow, big one. Hey, did...could you see the flash?"

"Yes." Sesshoumaru padded to the table, their food rattling gently on a wooden tray. He set the tray down and lifted off two smaller trays. "Domburi is at nine o'clock, salt is at three, tea is at twelve and the chopsticks are at six."

"Thanks." Kagome blinked as the tray settled before her and instinctively touched each item to confirm their locations. She sprinkled a little salt on her domburi. "That rain sounds pretty nasty. I may be stuck here until it lets up."

His teacup clicked. "We'll make that decision later. Eat."

Sighing softly to herself, Kagome grasped her chopsticks and took a tentative bite of eel. The flavor melted all over her taste buds. "Mmm!" She scooped her bowl up and started to eat properly. "Hey um, why do you have a brick for a nightstand?"

"Ah, that." He sipped his tea, "It is a piece of stone from the Great Wall of China." Another sip. "I have items from all over the world strewn about my home. Objects are like photographs. I can touch them and remember where I was when I acquired them. I have pieces of paper brailled by Louis Braille's hands. I have a statue of Anubis, another of Shiva and a David, but I'm sure you already found those. There are...many memories surrounding us, but I don't wish to discuss them all tonight."

His words struck Kagome dumb. She had forgotten that while she yo-yo'ed back and forth through time, Sesshoumaru was actually living it minute by minute.

"That's...wow...maybe sometime you can tell me about your stuff."

"Yes, in the future," he clicked his chopsticks, "perhaps."

They fell silent.

Sesshoumaru ate so quietly that she never noticed so much as a slurp or a swallow. Kagome was at a loss for what to say next. She could almost picture him sitting cross-legged with his domburi bowl in one hand, the chopsticks in another and neatly popping small bites into his mouth.

Suddenly, he said, "Down."

A soft whine came from her right.

"I do apologize. Fluffy occasionally begs for food." Sesshoumaru audibly tore a few strips of eel from the piece he was eating and dropped them on the floor. The dog readily and noisily consumed them. A command from Sesshoumaru sent Fluffy padding to a quiet corner where he fell silent.

"Ironically...Inuyasha could be like that." Kagome swallowed and reached for her tea. "The first time I brought ramen back, he wouldn't leave me alone until I gave him some. He was addicted from that time on."

"Did you love him?"

That came from so far out of left field that Kagome choked on her tea. Coughing and gagging, she covered her mouth with a napkin. Sesshoumaru stayed politely silent while she regained her wits. "Yes...and no."

He set his chopsticks down. "Explain."

She stared down towards the tabletop, small pains welling in her heart. "He was an extremely close friend. I did love him, I was attracted to him, but I knew that he would never see me as anything other than a reminder of Kikyou. I still wanted to hang around him, though, to help him find the jewel shards, so we agreed to stay friends."

Thunder roared through the house. Kagome felt it slam into her breastbone. Rain pounded onto the roof like the hoofbeats of warhorses.

Sesshoumaru rattled something on his tray. "You definitely won't be traveling tonight."

"Hm?"

"This street tends to flood when it rains this hard." He said matter of factly between sips of tea. "The city isn't very good about keeping the storm drains clear."

"I figured as much. I can sleep on the couch if - "

A derisive snort cut her off. "My bed can accommodate two people. Surely you would prefer someplace warmer than the couch, which is lying right in a draft."

 _In Sesshoumaru's bed_. Kagome's heart doubled its cadence at the thought of sleeping so close to him. He did prove himself past that 'kill all humans' phase...still, she didn't know whether to be happy or afraid. She felt as if sleeping in his bed, even by invitation, was invading his space, contaminating his inner sanctum...and yet so naughty and forbidden.

Sex happened in beds.

Before she could ponder it further, Sesshoumaru asked, "Finished?" When she indicated yes, he placed their dishes neatly on the larger tray and carried them into the kitchen.

This time Kagome followed. Using the sounds he made around the sink as cues, she started the water and searched for dish soap. "At least let me help you do the dishes, okay?"

"If you feel the need, be my guest." He plunked the dish soap near her left hand. Their elbows bumped as they worked together, Kagome washing each dish and rinsing it while Sesshoumaru waited with the dishcloth. She let the sink's hiss drown out the rest of her thoughts, but she couldn't shake her awareness of his hip lightly touching hers.

"So um...what do you do around here after hours? Power's off, no music..."

"I grade papers, mostly." Then, in an almost teasing tone, he asked, "How is your report on me going?"

She flicked suds at him, "You'll find out."

"I see." Sesshoumaru dodged away, all but his elbow escaping her wrath.. "I am quite eager to see what you have to say. Just remember that I grade based on grammar and spelling as well, and I don't count grade three braille as proper writing." With that, he started to put the dishes into a cabinet above Kagome's head. In order to do so, he had to lean against her, which meant his chest touched her breasts. He was only wearing a thin polo shirt and jeans, and they left little of his hard body to the tactile imagination. His slightly damp apple-scented hair and warm breath tickled her cheek. He kept brushing against her to put clean dishes away.

Kagome struggled for the air trapped in her throat. Was he checking her out? Did he know how excited she was getting? Surely he could smell her budding arousal in such close quarters!

One of the clocks stated the hour. Nearly seven o'clock.

It shattered the moment.

Sesshoumaru drew back, slowly, and padded from the kitchen. "I have papers to grade. There are books by the couch that should keep you busy for..." he calculated silently, "one hour, two at the most. I'll warn you in advance that I tend to retire shortly after."

She leaned on her hands to keep herself from feeling his body again. "You, going to bed early? That's hard to imagine. I can't even picture you sleeping."

A soft chuckle, barely louder than a breath. "Weekends _are_ when I sleep. Demon sleep is coma-like, thus I am vulnerable, and I require twelve hours of it to make up for the entire seven days I'm awake. So it is better that I retire at nine than at midnight, don't you agree?"

"You have a point." She brushed past him, one hand trailing the counter and the other stretching out to locate obstacles hiding at waist level. "I'll let you get started."

Sesshoumaru joined her on the couch a few minutes later. He plunked away on a slate and stylus while Kagome entertained herself with a cheesy science fiction novel.

o0o

One hour later...

Concentrating on a book with a very attractive man nearby was impossible, Kagome discovered. She badly wished she could see just so she could peek over at Sesshoumaru without him noticing. She kept picturing him with his hair spilling over his shoulder, nimble fingers gliding across each page like a soft caress. Did he still keep his face composed? Or did he have something other than indifference curling his lips? Were those lines around his eyes visible to sighted people?

"What color shirt do you have on?" Kagome asked, and immediately she blushed. She hadn't meant to ask that out loud!

"Black," drawled Sesshoumaru. "Why?" he added distantly, too absorbed in his current task to pay full attention to her question.

"Oh...just curious."

"Mm."

Black....black as his pupils. Black as raven feathers. His skin and hair probably glowed next to the dark fabric.

Sesshoumaru burped softly and politely excused himself. "Supper is settling," was all he said about it, but Kagome found the idea of him belching quite strange. She couldn't even picture him using the bathroom, let alone burping and passing gas.

Fluffy let himself out through the doggy door by the couch. He returned and shook off, sending water splattering everywhere. Kagome screeched. Sesshoumaru paid it no mind. Fluffy padded over to a food dish under the kitchen counter and crunched away on his kibbles.

"Fluffy! You big, silly dog!" Kagome giggled, "C'mere!"

A cold, wet nose nudged her palm. She laughed and stroked the dog's soft head. Fluffy mopped her face with his tongue and scampered off to finish eating.

The slate and stylus thudded against the couch. Sesshoumaru yawned and stretched; he was done earlier than Kagome anticipated. She felt his weight leave the cushion and strained her ears to hear which way he went. He'd gone into his bedroom, faint rustlings indicating he was changing out of his clothes.

Her heart thudded faster. The blood roared in her eyes, ears and other places. Warmth pooled in her face and belly. Without thinking, she walked to the table in the middle of the living room, turned and stopped in the doorway. She could hear him rummaging in his closet, his feet swishing on the tatami mat. Two hangers jiggled, then came the dull thump of his jeans hitting the floor. A softer thud for his shirt. Then a hiss as he pulled on some type of pajama garment, probably soft cotton pants. She heard the sink start up and the scratchy noises of him brushing his teeth.

Latent thunder boomed outside. Kagome barely heard it over her own heartbeat. She reached for her obi and tugged out the knot, letting the fabric fall open. A line of cool air struck her skin, bringing forth waves of goosebumps. Her shoulders froze halfway into a shrug. What if he laughed at her? What if he had no desire for her in return? Was it worth the risk?

_"If a captive bird doesn't leave its cage when the opportunity arises, it will never again know freedom. Take a risk once in awhile, escape that cage... Even if you fail, at least you ventured beyond the bars and discovered something new."_

She let the yukata fall away. The fabric pooled behind her heels, warm from her body heat.

"Sesshoumaru?"

The sink cut off. He spat twice. From the bathroom door, he replied, "Yes?"

It would be so easy to crawl back into that gilded cage. She could pull the yukata back on and make up some other excuse for calling his name. Ugly doubts tugged the very fabric of her sanity, but the sound of his voice gave her courage.

Kagome parted her lips. "I'm naked."

Silence.

"Do you hear me?" she went on, "I'm na - "

Smooth hands cupped her shoulders, the palms hotter than fire against her cool skin. They traveled inward to converge at her throat and slipped up towards her face. She felt him explore her features. His touch was as light as when he read braille, soft fingertips gliding feather-light across her visage. She parted her lips and exhaled on his thumb when it ghosted across her mouth. His minty breath grew closer and suddenly his mouth latched onto hers. Remains of toothpaste made her lips tingle.

"Mmh..." Kagome found herself between the door frame and Sesshoumaru's shirtless frame. His mouth molded her lips to his will, his probing tongue desperately seeking entrance. She parted her lips to let him in and reached up, entangling her fingers in his beautiful long hair. Her world became the breathless, hungry sucking noises of their repeated kisses.

"I want to explore you," whispered Sesshoumaru.

She grasped his wrists and guided them to her breasts, moaning at the feel of his fingers exploring her fleshy orbs and erect nipples. Sesshoumaru knelt and rubbed his hands all up and down her body. Each pass his palms made sent scorching heat into her belly. Every inch of her skin became an erogenous zone. Then his fingertips found her womanly secrets and the world fell away from existence. Her body threatened to ignite with passion, he was touching her, seeing her, knowing her, all the while fueling her desire. She shivered as his breath followed the curve of her breast and a velvet tongue probed her nipple. His tongue went lower still, until hot moisture suddenly rustled her pubic curls and the swollen tissues underneath. His minty toothpaste made her tingle almost unbearably. He moved his finger within her while he massaged her clitoris with his lips in such a way that she had three mini-orgasms just from his mouth alone.

"Ohhh..." Kagome arched against his moist warmth, hissing his name.

He inhaled deeply. She felt him smile against her pubic bone. His mouth withdrew, but his hands continued down her legs like a sculptor molding a clay figurine. Then he cupped her buttocks and pressed himself to her. A throbbing erection strained against his cotton pajama bottoms. He was so hard she was literally sitting on it when he pinned her against the doorframe. Her legs had nowhere to go except around his waist.

"Look at what you've done to me, Kagome," he rumbled. Thunder followed his intonation.

"I can see that," Kagome said back, panting, "but I want to see all of you."

Sesshoumaru placed her hand on his face. He was grinning at her, she felt the smoothness of his teeth barely showing between his curved lips. She kissed the smile at the same moment her hands touched his bare shoulders. Solid muscle. Kagome's curious fingers and lips explored every available inch of his upper body - his bulging biceps and perfect forearms, his delicate throat and fine collarbones, his sculpted chest and the softness of his nipples, his strong back and his delicious abdominals. He had a velvety line of fine hair growing from his belly button to his pubic area where it spread out like a waterfall of fur. She felt him shudder upon her sliding his leggings off while exploring his tight butt and silky thighs. She swore she heard him moan as she bypassed his erection to take in his calves and shins.

At last, Kagome grasped Sesshoumaru's pulsing hardness. It burned in her hand, stiff as an iron rod wrapped in soft satin. Fluid dribbled from the slitted opening at its tip. Veins twitched millimeters beneath the skin. He was large, but not overly so. She let her hand slide towards his body, brushing first his foreskin and then the softness of his long pubic hairs. With her palm she cupped his petal-soft sac. Though warm, his testicles were cooler than the rest of him and his scrotum was drawing tighter to his body, a sign that he was highly aroused.

She took the tip of his hardness between her lips. He wouldn't fit all the way into her mouth, so she settled for teasing his frenulum and massaging his testicles instead. This time, he most definitely moaned. His penis tasted musty, just like skin that had been sweaty and trapped inside clothes would taste at the end of the day, shower or not. With her tongue, she marveled at the different textures of him. The tip was softer and plushier than the shaft, which was full of veins and creases. His fluffy fringe smelled like soap, salt and thyme. Pushing it even further, she lapped at his sac, causing him to hiss at her.

Without warning, Sesshoumaru flipped her around so her breasts brushed the doorframe. "Look with your body, Kagome..." he panted against her shoulder, "don't think."

Kagome blinked, confused, and then his wet tongue drew a long line from the crease of her backside to the base of her neck. At the same time he also dragged his nails lightly from her shoulders to her hips. The mixed sensations made her moan and dig her fingers against the wall. She breathed deeply, feeling as though the world didn't have enough air. He did the same thing again and her legs threatened to collapse. Then he outlined her ear with his tongue while using two fingers to stroke her vulva. He slipped a third inside, massaging her from within. His other hand snaked up to fondle her breast.

The sensations threatened to drive her mad. She pressed herself against the cold door frame, her damp palms squeaking against its smoothness. "Sssse....Sesshoumaru..."

"We should continue this in bed." Sesshoumaru said, grasping her arm and leading her four steps to the right.

Kagome soon found herself lying face-up on a cushion of softness, him looming above her with his hardness pressed to her moist opening and his smooth hair falling all over her legs and sides.

Time stood still, the world silent except for the rain and their ragged breathing. Kagome stared up into nothing and wondered if Sesshoumaru's eyes still had their piercing stare. The thought dissolved when he kneaded her breasts and leaned down to suck the side of her throat. It made her smile and wrap her arms around his neck. She tugged his head up to press her kiss-swollen lips to his, eager to feel his tongue in her mouth again.

"Please, Sesshoumaru..." Kagome stroked the tips of his pointed ears and rolled her hips against his. She was wet, her slick juices creating slippery strings between herself and wherever his skin touched her engorged vulva. "Please."

His answer was immediate, but silent. First there was the burning pressure as he stretched her, but it passed when he broke her barrier and came to rest in her depths. In one stroke he filled the emptiness she fought so hard to forget. She felt his breath on her lips and rose to meet it, dragging him into a searing kiss.

Then he began to move. The veins on his shaft tickled her inside and out. She was hyper aware of every move he made inside her. Each outward stroke pulled his foreskin over the tip of his penis like a fist withdrawing into a sleeve. She could feel it scrunching and bunching. His nether hairs teased her outer lips. But most of all, she noticed his hands remained close to her face. Watching her reaction.

Kagome moaned and bit Sesshoumaru's sweaty shoulder. Sesshoumaru sped up his thrusts. The sensations he brought her rose and turned inward. She slid her hands down the length of his spine, loving how his ribs, spine and muscles moved like liquid metal under his smooth skin. His body was a wonderful, graceful machine of flesh and bone. She laid a hand to rest between them and felt his slippery length repeatedly impale her. Her other hand explored his face, finding his jaw tight and his eyebrows drawn together in fierce concentration. He panted hungrily as she touched the tender flesh above his lips.

The heat reached a blistering peak. Kagome arched into Sesshoumaru and cried out, letting the sensations tear her body asunder. Her hands moved off his face to pull his hair and she dug her heels into his backside to encourage his thrusts. He gladly thrust harder, jiggling her breasts and making the sheets rustle. She continued to cry out against his cheek while his fuzzy fringe grew soaked in her stringy juices.

Just as she was coming down, she sensed new tension in his body. She placed her hands on his slightly sweaty face and felt his lips part in a silent moan. He tilted his head and rubbed his taut cheek against her hand. His facial bones changed slightly under her palms. He growled, gripped her shoulders tight and released, the deep pulsations spewing warmth into her cooling belly. The air rushed from his lungs and roared like hot steam across her ear. His entire body went rigid as steel, almost as though he dared something to come along and challenge him.

Reality swirled back into being. Kagome heard herself panting softly in rhythm with the pounding rain outside. Sesshoumaru was still breathing heavily as well, the air from his lips tickling her earlobe. She followed his breath to indulge in another long, slow kiss. He seemed happy to oblige. She smiled, loving how soft his small mouth felt against hers.

"I took a risk," whispered Kagome.

Sesshoumaru outlined her ear with his tongue. "Did you like what you found?"

"Mmhmm..." She lifted her hand to touch the side of his face, right where she knew his stripes marked his cheekbone. Everything about him was so beautiful. She never believed she could experience beauty without sight, but he came along and proved her wrong. Their long walks, the carnival, the ice skating, the trek in the rain, the music, the food, his touch, his voice, his smell and his taste...her remaining senses were more alive than ever.

Kagome felt Sesshoumaru shift beneath her. The sheets rustled, then the world flipped and she found herself draped across his chest with her head on his shoulder. She absently ran her fingers over his perfect collarbone and followed the tendon on his throat up to his masculine jawbone. The skin stretched slightly. She let her fingertips flit upwards and found a small smile waiting on his lips. He sucked her finger into the warm, wet cavern of his mouth, teased it and let go. At the same time she felt him stroking her hair, his slender digits occasionally brushing her ear.

"It's still there, isn't it?"

She frowned, "What?"

"The world," Sesshoumaru clarified, his voice slurring. He was starting to fall asleep.

"Ah," Picking her head up, Kagome touched a kiss to his lips, "Yeah...it's still there, and I'm still here."

A soft laugh made his chest quake. "Good."

Then Sesshoumaru turned his head away, a clear sign that he wanted to stop talking and sleep. Kagome reluctantly slid off and settled on her right side with her back to him. He dislodged the sheets with his feet, pulled them up around them both and she felt them go taut as he rolled onto his left side. Still, even with his back to her, he slipped a foot up and gently squeezed her calf with his toes.

"You're laying on my hair," he said.

"Oh, sorry!" Kagome lifted herself up so he could move his long hair out of the way. She heard him flip it up behind his head and settle down again. Closing her eyes, she smiled and once more stretched out on her side. "Good night, Sesshoumaru."

"G'mmh," was the sleepy reply. Within seconds Sesshoumaru's breathing established a soft, steady rhythm.

o0o

Gentle warmth roused Kagome from a vividly colorful dream. She awoke lying on her back, forgetting where she was until the smell of thyme reminded her. Sesshoumaru had gone to sleep facing away, but turned over sometime during the night. His soft breath stirred her bangs.

Sunlight poured through the window behind the antique table. She smiled at its warmth on her face.

"Sesshoumaru?" Kagome whispered, "Are you awake?"

No reply.

Tentatively, she reached a hand out to touch him. Sesshoumaru seemed to be sleeping with one arm folded under his head, completely insensate. By some miracle of gravity his hair stayed draped above his head, and Kagome could imagine it gleaming in the sunlight coming through the window. Her probing fingertips grazed his parted lips and followed the relaxed line of his cheekbone. She felt his eyes roll back and forth beneath his closed lids, causing his long eyelashes to tremble. His mouth and eyebrows twitched, leading her to wonder what a demon like him dreamed about. She moved her fingers back over his lips and bent to kiss them. Then she slid towards the edge of the bed, let the messy bun out of her hair and stood up. Some poking around produced the yukata she dropped last night.

Stretching as she walked, Kagome made her way out into the living room. Claws clicked toward her and a cold nose touched her hand.

"Aww, hi there, Fluffy." She knelt to rub her hands through the husky's soft fur. Fluffy whined and rested his chin on her knee. A giggle bubbled in her throat, "Hungry?"

The dog stood immediately and skittered off towards the kitchen. Kagome followed Fluffy's panting. He shook himself, causing his tags to jingle. She heard him paw at a bag and probed its sides for an opening. A chip clip held one corner sealed. She unclipped it, confirmed the metal bowl's location with her other hand and poured a generous portion. Fluffy nudged her out of the way, gobbling noisily.

 _What a sweet dog. Hey...where did Sesshoumaru put my cane?_ This sudden thought left Kagome trembling. Her cane was the biggest part of her independence. Without it she was dependent on strangers. With her heart in her throat she confirmed her sense of direction via the table and shuffled to the door. She was relieved to find her folded cane sitting on a little table two steps to the left of the door. Beside it, she discovered Sesshoumaru's cane. Sesshoumaru's cane was heavier than an armload of textbooks and almost as long as she was tall. The length of it felt like the same material as Tetsusaiga, leading her to wonder if he had it made from his own fangs. She noticed the handle had the same shape as Toukijin's, right down to the circular pommel.

 _Knowing Sesshoumaru, he wouldn't want to use an old, ordinary, everyday cane anyway. This suits him_.

With that, Kagome scuffed her way into the half-bath to empty her bladder, wash her face and clean her teeth the best she could with running water and her finger. Her legs were slightly cramped from last night. _Last night_ , she thought, _was the happiest I've been in three years_. It made her smile at the mirror she knew hung above the sink and made her way back to Sesshoumaru's bedroom.

The sheets rustled. "Kagome?" Sesshoumaru's voice was slightly hoarse, but not slurred.

Startled, Kagome turned her face towards him. "I'm here, at the door. Did I wake you up?"

"Mm, no...nothing can wake me once I'm asleep. What time is it?"

"Dunno, I haven't checked any clocks.

"Mm." A swish as he rubbed a hand down his face. A pause, then he did it again. He launched himself off the bed and scrambled towards the window. Kagome heard the shoji screen close and re-open. Then came the thud of him either banging the window with his fist or his forehead settling against the glass, she couldn't tell which.

"Sesshoumaru?"

"The light," Sesshoumaru said, his low voice reflecting off the glass, "I knew this day was coming."

The full impact of Sesshoumaru's words didn't hit her until she heard him sit on the end of the bed, bow his head and clasp both hands between his knees.

 _He can't see the light anymore. He's as blind as I am, now_.

She knelt in front of him and grasped his hands. "Are you okay?"

Sesshoumaru pulled one hand back, swiping it audibly across his face. "I'm - " he cleared his throat, " - I'm fine, Kagome. I'll adjust and no one will know the difference."

 _He says he's fine, but he's had light perception for centuries, and now even that little bit is gone. There's no way he can be 'fine'..._ Kagome squeezed his hand, _at least he isn't alone this time_.

"Kagome," he lifted his head, "I'm fine."

She squeezed his wrists. "I know you would give anything for your light perception back. You said the same thing when you mentioned losing that pinhole of sight you used to have."

Leaning forward, Sesshoumaru brushed a thumb across her lips and said, "I will miss the light, that I admit, but I will adapt. Losing light perception isn't as bad as losing partial vision." He toyed with her bottom lip, "Much of the time, I'm not even aware that my eyes aren't functioning. I don't 'see' the darkness. It is there between me and the light, but I'm not struggling to see through it. Does that make sense?"

"Mmhmm." Kagome nodded the affirmative. Come to think of it, she realized that she, too, was starting to forget that her eyes weren't seeing. She was too busy thinking of other things...like what to do with her future and the rest of her life. The reality of so many things out there that she _could_ still do nearly bowled her over.

Sesshoumaru pushed himself to stand. His slightly mussed hair brushed Kagome's cheek as he walked past her and entered the bathroom. He didn't close the door, so she heard everything when he used the toilet and washed his hands. Then he rattled around in the closet and crackled a brush through his long mane.

"I'm going to see if the power is back on, and then I'll feed Fluffy and start coffee. Kagome, while I do that, you walk outside and stand on the grass out back."

That sounded like an odd request. Lately, Sesshoumaru had asked her to do a million strange things that turned out to be wonderful, so what was one more?

"I already fed him." she said, "So...I'll see you outside."

Kagome and Sesshoumaru walked together into the living room. She stepped left and carefully slipped the fusama open enough to walk outside. Cold, wet grass shocked her bare feet. Her first inhalation was of a clean world fresh after a long rain. The air had not yet re-tainted itself with the smog of engine fumes and other pollutants. She smelled roses, pine, eucalyptus, grass, wet earth and steam from water evaporating off wood. Birds were chirping all around, and far in the distance came sounds from the street.

She stretched her hands towards the sun and smiled. _This feels like paradise_.

The fusama rumbled. She smelled the coffee long before Sesshoumaru touched her shoulder. His presence didn't disturb the peace at all.

"Two creams," he rumbled.

"Just how I like it. Thanks," she replied, accepting the warm cup in both hands. It was one of those mugs with a wide bottom to prevent tipping. "Who does your gardening?"

Sesshoumaru chuckled, "I do." He stepped up beside her. "You're facing the roses...about a foot in front of them is a pond with lotus blossoms and fish. There is a vegetable garden on the left, it has carrots, potatoes and squash...I just planted tomatoes last month...and there are two pine trees on the right. A cherry blossom tree overlooks the southwestern corner of the yard, but it has already shed for the year." He sipped again, "The carrots I put in the domburi last night came fresh from my yard, not some silly supermarket that mutates them with chemicals."

Kagome turned towards his voice, her mind flooding with images of him, dressed in his kimono, armor and fur, on his knees digging holes in mud and pulling carrots out of the ground. She couldn't help the snicker that escaped, "That's something I can't quite imagine without laughing. Getting dirty seems somehow beneath you...or something."

"That is why showers were invented." He swallowed noisily, tapping his mug with his nails. "On the other hand...there are far worse things to be covered in than dirt."

"Yeah," she gulped, "true."

Turning, Sesshoumaru lifted a hand to touch her mouth. Kagome inclined her chin in time to be met with his lips. His kiss tasted like coffee and musty sex with a hint of overnight tang, the perfect final touch to a flawless morning.

o0o

"...there are a few of you who should be ashamed they put their names on these papers." Sesshoumaru's silken voice drifted around the room. "Ten pages of regurgitated encyclopedia information is not what I asked for."

A folder slid onto Kagome's desk, prompting her to wake from her reverie and sit up straight. Sesshoumaru walked right on past her. He was still talking, but she wasn't listening, her fingers seeking the braille tag on the inside sleeve of the folder. She was surprised to find an B+ with a dozen notes pointing out grammatical errors. Among them were lines like: _You forgot a period on line fourteen of page one. The first word used on line six of page two is not the correct grade two contraction for "before". Commas are your friend, don't be afraid to use them_.

It was just so nitpicky that she had to laugh. All the information was right, at least, and the last line of his note congratulated her for taking yet another risk, this one being the submission of such detailed information not found anywhere in writing.

 _If only the world knew,_ Kagome thought to herself. She put her head down on her desk and smiled, remembering everything she went through over the past couple of months. Sesshoumaru was an excellent teacher, especially when it came to life lessons.

"...finals are tomorrow. Be prepared."

The bell rang, creating a discordant stampede for the door.

Kagome took her time rearranging her folder and note-taker. When the last student left, it grew quiet enough for her to hear Sesshoumaru working his brailler at ninety miles per second.

"Don't you have another class?" he asked.

"Not today."

"Oh." The brailler continued without missing a beat. His voice lowered a half octave, almost purring. "Mm, in that case...coffee?"

Kagome smiled in Sesshoumaru's general direction. The tone he just used entailed more than coffee. "You're on."


End file.
